Some musings on relationships :o)

The oldest guy who I ever slept with was 41; he was an artist who made the local newspaper, he invited me over because he was feeling lonely, (worst kisser of my life); the youngest was 18 (he’s a Marine who wants to be an artist, oddly enough) was (and is) an amazing guy. I keep in touch with the Marine, sporadically, but it’s nice to know he’s doing well.

The first time I had sex was when I was 19, he was 36, he was a bartender. I found myself on the floor of the bar a few weeks after dating (seeing?) him regularly…I’m not really sure what to call it, but whatever it was, he was my first Gay Kiss…he was a lot of firsts actually. He was six foot two, in good shape, I had to stand on my toes to kiss him (I’m 5′ 5″)…he was an awesome kisser; made second only by Vince who set the bar high. The ride was fun while it lasted and I’m glad it happened because it was an experience and it’s something I can look back at with a smile.

Vince was the best ride of my life (to date) and he’s the guy who set the bar for me, for what a good kiss should feel like (he would lock his lips with mine, squeeze me against him, as he sucked the air out of my chest, into him, and breathe it out his nose). He would also toss me around like I was a rag doll, it was amazing. In bed, He’d wrap his body tight around mine at night and not allow me to move…I got used to the smell of his deodorant, because he kept my in the crook of his arm when he wasn’t wrapped around me from behind…when he was, his chin would be over my shoulder, and we would become a knot of arms and legs.

And as I look back over the guys with whom I’ve had encounters and relations with, I’ve been lucky, because I’ve had no regrets…even relationships that didn’t last, have all gone right…and I think I’m pretty blessed because of it.

However, I think it was also really good to get a range of ages in, because it let me find what I like and while I’m still attracted to guys who are older than me (being younger than me is definitely a turn off) I’ve found that I feel most comfortable with people who are no more than around five-ish years older than I am…so guys who are 27 usually fit the bill (at this point in time)

…however, there are always those exceptions to the rule (which I why I try not to make rules, but guidlines) that walk by once you think you’ve got everything figured out…he’s older, and in shape…and has an accent that makes me weak and a Hugh Grant attraction that I can’t even begin to describe…he’s tall…I come up to his chest…and that one catch, that ruins the potential for everything…is that he’s painfully, painfully straight…which is fine, because I’m moving out of this country come hell or high water so while I don’t want a relationship (now) it would, however, have been nice if I could look and touch, however (sadly) for this adonis…museum rules apply.

Ahh, musings.

Now, bed…then paper, then laundry…then freedom…