Subject: Frat Boy Mayhem Part I
Date: Wednesday 10/11/06 2:59:00 AM
So the past few days, Tuna from AEPi, has attacked me with the pre-inked “For Deposit Only” stamp in the Hillel office. Most of the other frat boys I could probably take down, Tuna however is six feet three (to my five feet five), and about a billion and a half lbs (on a good day), which means that when he holds me down and stamps me, there isn’t really much I can do about it (it’s like attempting to pick up and carry a beached whale with a goiter, it’s NOT going to happen).
The war is on…if he were at all athletic the answer would be a simple icey-hot application to the jockstrap and a nair injection to the shampoo; however since he hasn’t seen the inside of a gym since kindergarten and whether or not he bathes on a frequent enough basis to warrant getting into the frat house, and making the effort is highly suspect, so that won’t do either.
This will require thought, planning, and guile…and perhaps some help…we’ll see…
The war is on!